And the other ESFJ I know likes my ESTJ friend too. And there aren't a lot of jealous feelings either, because you feel like you can take on all rivals because they give you confidence, unlike with an ENTJ where you just feel stunted when other people are around. There was a time when I was going around typing everyone, up front asking questions to get a type code, specifically looking for an ENTJ, didn't tell them that at the time of course.
This corresponds to the Socionics description but that's my experience. And there was this girl called Gillian and she came out as ESFJ and I kind of dismissed her, despite her being a really nice person.
ESFJs have dominant extroverted feeling (Fe), while INTPs have inferior Fe.
INTPs have dominant introverted thinking (Ti) while ESFJs have inferior Ti.
And no, you can't change your type to become a match up, however you can change your attitude to patch up few problems, but the core of the problems won't go away. Zoidberg I too am an ESFj/p female who dated an INTp male for a couple of years. INTjs welcome the ESFj's attempts at opening them up, INTps would tend to find the ESFj's approach annoying. I seriously cannot imagine at all how a INTp - ESFj relationship would work out.
The relationship started out very positively, we both found each other's qualities both interesting and inspiring, in fact it was probably the most romantic time I've ever had in any partnership. Perhaps it could, if you guys don't get close to each other, then again, it defeats the purpose of a relationship. He tends to drive me insane at times and half the time I can't understand some of the things he says or does...
While SJs are interested in security and tradition, NTs strive for completely different things: innovation, change and challenge.
Complete lack of understanding in both directions, ultimate battle of intuitive thinking vs. Manipulative, superficial, tireless, fanatical, prone to tantrums, dishonest, self-promoting, lack of self-awareness, hypocritical, opportunistic, controlling, repetitive, dull.
These are the traits I associate with ESFJs through my most prominent negative role model.
(Figuring this out is the kind of thing that drives an INTP insane!
) KNich said: My mother is also ESFJ, and I would rather be alone forever than be trapped in a common space with a woman like that with no line of retreat.